Chris Gayle charged with metaphysical rape

Chris Gayle charged with metaphysical rape
12/01/16
CNN staff writer

West Indies cricketer Chris Gayle has been formally charged by Australian police for violating the country's metaphysical rape laws. Gayle is accused of “violently complimenting” Miss Mel Mclaughin, a television presenter to whom he made several flattering comments. If proven guilty, Gayle could face as much as seven years in a hypothetical prison.

Mel Mclaughin: wants to be taken seriously as a woman

Chris Gayle: says his comments weren't meant to be taken seriously

Gayle, who hails from the island of Jamaica, is no stranger to controversy. In the summer of 2015 he publicly flirted with a female reporter, a shocking incident which continues to baffle the academic community. “Were Gayle's comments sexist or were they flattering?” psychologist Niles Crane of the San Antonio Department of Mental Health asks. “When does admiration become sexism? When does infatuation become violation? Who the hell knows anymore?”

Harvard scientist tests for sexism.

To determine when exactly a comment becomes sexist, scientists at the Harvard Department of Social Sciences conducted an experiment in which Gayle's lewd comments were repeated by 100 different people, including Gayle himself. The scientists found that in each instance, the comments were not perceived to be sexist, unless spoken by Chris Gayle himself. “What our research shows,” scientist Carol Hall said, “is that Chris Gayle's comments are primarily sexist when spoken by Chris Gayle.”

Chris Gayle - possibly the source of all sexism

Jamaican feminist Jessica Yardwell disagrees with such research. “The problem is not Chris Gayle,” Yardwell said from her home in Trenchtown. “Men as a whole are incapable of civilized behaviour around women. Men objectify women, reducing complex, multifaceted human beings to objects of titillation; playthings for their narcissistic, phallocentric egos. The problem is even worse in Jamaica, where absentee fathers are commonplace.”

Marcus Gayle walked out on the family when his son was 5.
He has since walked all the way to Zimbabwe.

Mrs Yardwell's views find support across social media. For many, the eroticisation of the female form has become a way of exercising power over women and silencing their professional attributes.

Channel 9 Sports, for whom Mel Mclaughin presents a daily T20 cricket show, strongly agrees. “Listen, we hired what's-her-name because she's sexy as hell,” Channel 9 chairman Ed Daily admitted, “but being a smoking hot broad doesn't give Gayle a license to be misogynistic. This is the 21st century. We're sophisticated people. Cultured people. T20 cricket is serious cricket.”

T20 cricket. Almost as sophisticated as opera.

But French existentialist Jean Baudrillard has a more nuanced take on the issue: “We all exist in someone else's fantasy. Women objectify men, men objectify women, and both are biologically conditioned to lust after the opposite sex. A society can and should police its hormones, but it must be fair and clear in what constitutes a violation. If human beings cannot compliment one another, the human race is doomed.”

Gayle insists he maintains a respectable distance from adoring fans

Women on the newly set up website, “StopChrisGayle.com”, are far more militant in their opinions. “Gayle calls himself World Boss and thinks he's God's gift to women,” Lesbo69 writes, "but I wouldn't find him attractive even if I liked men.” One mother, who calls herself Kohlifan99, writes: “I am a mother with 2 daughters and I don't feel safe knowing Gayle is out there. Banning him from T20 leagues isn't enough. Gayle must be banned from the solar system and chemically castrated.”

Gayle, from World Boss to Racist caricature

To West Indian socialist Mappy Mapoui, this all amounts to a racist witchhunt. “It's simple,” Mapoui writes on “Leaning on Lenin”, his popular blog. “What we're seeing here is the resurgence of old black stereotypes. A lynch mob has formed around Gayle, and the media have delighted in portraying him as a leering sex maniac; a black predator who preys on vulnerable white women. But I know Gayle. Gayle is a good fella. He just wants to share his penis. Pass it around the community. Give everyone equal access to his crotch. Gayle don't discriminate. His meat is like my man Marx's thoughts on socio-economics: everybody gets a share. But the white man wants to force its culture down my boy's pants. The white man wants to monopolise and privatize Gayle's privates. They want him to lock that python away. And this s**t happens whenever you give those neo-conservative capitalists power. They teach you to commodify and fetishize everything around you, and then get upset when you do just that. Well I ain't taking that s**t anymore. What we need is to organise and.... (to read the rest of Mapoui's argument, click here to download a 5.5Gig text file)."

Sad Gayle is sad

Though the West Indies Cricket Board has yet to comment on Gayle's comments, the star batsman has received support from a number of his fellow teammates. Dwayne Bravo, famous for his feminist anthem “Go Gyal Go”, a song in which women are praised for their efforts to independently flex the muscles of their buttocks, stands by the big Jamaican. “Gayle is a gentleman,” Bravo said, “he loves and respects all skanks.”

The song is said to be based on feminist icon & civil rights activist Rosa Parks

Trinidadian batsman Lendl Simmons, who last year released a sex tape with ex girlfriend Lisa Hoe, echoes such sentiments: “Gayle taught me everything I know about treating hoes with respect and dignity.”

Lendl Simmons sex tape, now sticky on both sides.

The lone voice of dissent within the West Indies camp comes from Darren Bravo, ironically the only woman currently on the team. Bravo, who has battled sexism within the locker rooms since she started her career six years ago, believes that West Indian cricketers have a duty to act with dignity and respect. "At the end of the day," Bravo said, "you as a West Indian batsman have to decide what you wish to be remembered for: making runs or shaking your ass."

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Brilliant work, Trini, you have outdone yourself 

Is it just me, or did Gayle purposefully pay homage to Peter Tosh in that photoshoot?

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