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CLEVER Guyanese WOMAN

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02 Oct 2012 09:39 #104250 by chairman
A Guyanese woman and a Guyanese man are involved in a car accident;
it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally
demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt.


After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says,
"So you're a Guyanese man; that's interesting. I'm a Guyanese woman.
Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left,
but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from
God that we should meet and be friends and live together
in peace for the rest of our days."


Flattered, the man replied, "Oh yes, I agree with
you completely! This must be a sign from God!"


The Guyanese woman continued, "And look at this, here's
another miracle.
My car is completely demolished but this bottle of
wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this
wine and celebrate our good fortune."


Then she hands the bottle to the Guyanese man. The man nods
his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the
bottle and then hands the it back to the woman. The
woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back
on, and hands it back to the man.


The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"


The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for
the police."

Always tell someone how you feel because opportunities are lost in the blink of an eye but regret can last a lifetime.
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02 Oct 2012 14:32 #104360 by chairman

Always tell someone how you feel because opportunities are lost in the blink of an eye but regret can last a lifetime.
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02 Oct 2012 19:11 #104471 by boquiesse
Freddie Mercury was a true talent and I believe he is of Indian heritage.

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02 Oct 2012 19:12 #104472 by ketchim
He is also a faggot ..

Indian heritage !  ::lol::

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02 Oct 2012 19:17 #104475 by boquiesse
Yes he was a homosexual but that does not take away from his creativity.

He did a cover of "The Great Pretender" - excellent, as well as his collaboration with the Spanish opera singer whose name escapes me.

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02 Oct 2012 19:24 #104476 by ketchim
Actually he was born in Tanzania !  ::redcard::

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02 Oct 2012 19:28 #104477 by Kwami
PLACIDO DOMINGO

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03 Oct 2012 07:55 #104495 by chairman
A husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts, "Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It's been flickering for weeks now."

He looks at her and says angrily, "Fix the light? Now? Does it look like I have a G.E. logo printed on my forehead? I don't think so."

"Well then, could you fix the fridge door? It won't close right." To which he replied, "Fix the fridge door? Does it look like I have Westinghouse written on my forehead? I don't think so."

"Fine," she says, "Then could you at least fix the steps to the front door? They're about to break."

"I'm not a damn carpenter and I don't want to fix the steps," he says. "Does it look like I have Ace Hardware written on my forehead? I don't think so. I've had enough of you. I'm going to the bar!"

So he goes to the bar and drinks for a couple hours. He starts to feel guilty about how he treated his wife, and decides to go home and help out. As he walks into the house, he notices the steps are already fixed. As he enters the house, he sees the hall light is working. As he goes to get a beer, he notices the fridge door is fixed. "Honey, how'd this all get fixed?"

She said, "Well, when you left, I sat outside and cried. Just then a nice young man asked me what was wrong, and I told him. He offered to do all the repairs, and all I had to do was either screw him or bake him a cake."

He said, "So, what kind of cake did you bake him?"

She replied, "Hellooooo... Do you see Betty Crocker written on my forehead?"

Always tell someone how you feel because opportunities are lost in the blink of an eye but regret can last a lifetime.
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